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Master Class - The Fitzy Guide to Spin Bowling - The Glider


As suggested by the title, the glider is a ball that spends an astounding 86.2% of its life in mid-air. A strait, flighty tempter, the glider acts as a decoy to draw both experienced and novice batsmen alike into the ‘across the line slog’. Eventually, if employed accurately obtaining either a strait forward bowled wicket, or a draw due to the deteriorating light. The basic run up for a glider is 2 ¼ steps (size 5 ½ shoe). Your speed should be tempered to a specific velocity which almost gives the impression that your are able fend off the effects of Riga mortise for barely a matter of moments and no more. To maintain the correct run up speed, first start practising the glider with an old person on a stair lift. Side by side for three stairs and then release, making sure your release is no-where near the old person, as this might result in ‘a bit of a mess’

The release. Imagine you are driving in your motor vehicle and your mobile phone starts giving it a large Nokia beat. Aware of the current ‘Reichesque’ attitude towards the use of mobile phones whilst driving, you correctly pull over, by chance, into a bus lane, shut off the engine and answer your call. Only for a fucking traffic warden to appear out of bollocking nowhere to slap a ticket on your windscreen before miraculously disappearing back up his own arsehole where he belongs. Image if indeed he wasn’t the biggest arsehole on the planet, and had somehow encountered difficulty whilst attempting to disappear up his own arsehole. What hand gesture would you use to acknowledge the hardworking traffic wardens dedication to upholding UK traffic law? Right! This is the basic grip for handling the glider. Place the seam betwixt the two ‘v-sign’ fingers, and cradle in the palm of your hand with your thumb. Now place your thumb tip (if right handed) on the side of the seam closet to your ‘medial digit’ (if left handed, go back to school). Simply flick your thumb on release as if disposing of a cleverly excavated boogy from the tip of your forefinger. When releasing the glider your arm must be no lower than ‘as far back as is humanly possible without tearing your shoulder ligaments’, and no higher than ‘as far back as is humanly possible without tearing your shoulder ligaments’.

Your arm. The arm plays a vital role in the art of bowling (unless your playing blind cricket in which case – good luck). All the best practitioners of the glider have the unique ability to rest both hands, and ball on the summit of their abdomen whilst WALKING in for their delivery, saving vital energy, calories and therefore poundage for the long trek back to their (or someone else’s) car at the end of the day. It is essential that your WALK up and action are in no way associated and two separate entities. Eventually when reaching the point at which your arm is employed, think back to your primary school days; to Mrs. Toastybaps, and the game ‘wonky windmills’. Nb. Any further regression may lead to memories that are best left where they are . . . . . Steve. Simply swing your arm SLOWLY in the fashion of a wonky windmill, and release almost immediately – don’t fight it– if it feels natural, and your happy – then the release is appropriate.





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